36-19-0

At around 2:30 this morning, I officially turned 36. Every birthday I kind of reflect back on my life considering all that I've experienced and accomplished so far, along with of course comparing where I had hoped to be at this point in my life. I have definitely come to the realization (and yes, it's now been engrained in my mind) that I can't plan everything or control things that happen in my life. I had hoped/planned to be happily married (which I am), living in our own home ( which we are), and have 2.5 children (still waiting...). So I'm 36 years old. We've been together for 19 years. We have no children. I know I should be thankful (and I am) for everything and everyone I have in my life. Life could definitely be much worse. I need to remind myself of that and stick to the positive things.
I still think about what Mr. B said when he blessed our previous house. This was before we moved here and before I was diagnosed with my kidney disease. Along with blessing our house, he talked about other things. When he talked about our health, he seemed to focus mainly on dh and kind of avoided talking about my health at all which concerned me because what the heck did that mean? I had no clue what lay ahead. To this day, I think he saw it coming, but didn't want to tell me. Then he told us we would be moving again which we told him was crazy since that was our dream house. Well he ended up being 2 for 2 because a year later I was diagnosed with kidney disease and a couple of years later we decided to sell and move here to build what would really be our dream home in a place we could see raising a family. Since he hadn't mentioned anything about a family, I asked him about it. He brushed off the idea of fertility treatments saying we didn't need any of that and that we would have our own kids by ourselves. Since he turned out to be right about my health and moving, I still hold on to hope that he will be right about this as well. Only time will tell.
So dh has had 3 acupuncture treatments so far and she has put us on a supplement to help with fertility. I don't really think it's an herb because when I looked it up, it was described as the fungus that grows on the backs of caterpillars in China. I wish I didn't know that part. I had gone looking for more information about it because I wanted to know what it does for fertility. Since dh has started treatment too and because I've stabilized, she only sees me every other week. My bbt chart temperatures have drastically improved and with my energy levels increasing, I believe acupuncture and Chinese herbs really made the difference. I'm hoping dh feels/notices the difference too.