No Such Luck

Well, AF arrived this morning. So that tells me that although the Femara/Metformin and double IUI combination didn't work this cycle, the Metformin did help to lengthen my LP and prevented me from experiencing pre-AF spotting like I normally do. Always need to look on the bright side. Another positive is that I can carry and lift normally in comparison to if I was pregnant which will be helpful as I get ready for the new school year to start. I can get my classroom ready without worrying if I'm overdoing it.

Ryan just moved my workout equipment into the house so that's my cue to start working out. Over the past few months I've really gained some weight and it's making me a little depressed (I know pretty shallow) because I feel sluggish and can't fit into my clothes. If this cycle had turned out positive of course gaining weight and feeling like crap would've all been worth it.

I'm on day 11 of Metformin extended release and 2 days into the increased dosage from 500mg to 1000mg. I have to admit I think I've felt more side effects quicker with this form than with the regular Metformin. Maybe it could be my diet and lack of exercise that is probably adding to the crappy way I've been feeling. I haven't exactly been an angel as far as watching what I've been eating.

So it looks like today marks the start of a new beginning to take better care of myself especially since we've finally settled into our new home, and we're both starting off new jobs. Maybe this is the fresh start we've been looking for to kick everything off!

The 2 Week Wait

Well, yesterday by far was the worst that I have felt in comparison to all the medicated cycles I've been through in the past 8 years. I woke up yesterday morning feeling really hungry but really nauseated if that's even possible. I didn't think so until yesterday. I tried throwing up hoping it would alleviate the nausea, but no dice. All I did was dry heave several times over the course of a couple of hours. Poor Ryan. I had hoped and planned to make him pancakes for breakfast provided I wasn't nauseous. Of course things didn't go as planned and he had to settle for Honey Nut Cheerios. I tried eating a little cereal myself, but it only made me feel worse. After waiting an hour, I remembered that dry toast is supposed to be good for an upset or nauseous stomach. So I tried it and managed to finish it, hold it down, and eat another one right after. As the day progressed, I felt better. I still felt nauseous throughout the day and evening, but as long as I ate or drank something, the nausea passed.

I finally caved and called Loreen to ask for a prescription for the extended release Metformin. She advised me to take it once a day for 8 days and then twice a day thereafter just to see how my body reacts to it. So I decided to just take one regular Metformin yesterday instead of two, and then just start the extended release today. My little science experiment proved that the Metformin was causing my headaches and nausea because this morning I felt great. I woke up early and starving. So I decided to make Ryan pancakes this morning. No nausea or headache. Heaven. I was able to go about my day and get a lot done.

The 2 week wait is going by pretty quickly. It'll be one week tomorrow since the first IUI. Just one more week to go. Symptoms...some yellow discharge the past couple of days, fatigue (which could be due to the Metformin), and breast tenderness this afternoon. Other than that, nothing else to report. Still keeping our fingers crossed.

Second One To Seal The Deal

This morning wasn't any different than yesterday. I still didn't feel well at all. I felt nauseated and tired. Bleck! If the Metformin does the trick this cycle, it'll be well worth the torture. I let Loreen know about my nausea when we went for our second IUI and she said to give it to the end of next week and if I still feel sick to let them know. Then they'll prescribe the extended release Metformin.
The second IUI went well. Dh's count was 66 million today. Not bad for the second day. This morning I had experienced some reddish brown discharge which kind of looked like just before AF starts. I mentioned it to the nurse and she said it's probably from yesterday's IUI and my bladder infection that could have caused it. She didn't seem concerned. I had also experienced some cramping throughout the day. The sharp pains shoot from my cervix to my hip area and sometimes to my rear. I'm not sure what that's about.
Well now the two week wait begins...hopefully time flies by quickly.

Sick

Today's IUI went well. Ryan's count was 74 million which is higher than the previous IUIs we had done this year. It looked like a lot as we watched the strongest group of swimmers get loaded into my uterus. I tried to stay horizontal for as long as possible. Before I finally fell asleep this afternoon, I started feeling some pinching and cramping on the right side. I'm thinking maybe it was my egg releasing. Hopefully this group of swimmers or tomorrow's group meet up and get cozy.
After waking up from my nap, I didn't feel so well. I woke up with a headache and felt nauseated. After a while, I finally decided to take a shower, hoping it would make me feel better. Even before I could get in the shower the nausea intensified and I tried to throw up hoping that would make me feel better. Nothing came out. Ugh. I'm thinking it's probably due to a combination of all the medication I'm on - the trigger shot, Metformin, and now due to a bladder infection, Macrobid. I feel horrible.

Triggering...

I didn't feel so well today. I'm not sure if it was because I went to sleep very late last night and the past week's non-stop moving in caught up with me, or if it was the Metformin, or maybe a combination of both. I was very tired, had a slight headache, and felt nauseated for most of the morning. I didn't think I was going to make it to my appointment with Dr. C this afternoon judging by the way I was feeling this morning. Surprisingly after taking a very short nap and eating lunch I felt better.

My ultrasound went well. I have one nice big follicle measuring at 21mm, so he said it looks like I'm ready for an IUI tomorrow. So Loreen administered the hcg trigger shot and I go back in tomorrow at 11am. I asked him if we were just doing one or two IUIs this cycle and he said we can do one more on Saturday. I'm hoping and praying that the combination of Femara, Metformin and back to back IUI's does the trick. I was a little concerned about doing the IUI so soon after the trigger shot. But thinking about the recent IUIs we did, maybe this might be better. We had done the IUIs after more time had passed. Maybe we missed it all those times and this time we'll catch it earlier. Just like after the IVF, I'm planning on staying horizontal for the next couple of days to give my egg and Ryan's swimmers as much of a chance as possible to meet up and get cozy.

A Belated Update of Hope

I thought I posted an update after my appointment last week Wednesday with the dr. The appointment was what I anticipated it to be...closure and a review of the IVF. Dr. C with his awesome bedside manner took one look at me and knew I was very disappointed with the outcome of our first IVF. He asked if I felt like giving up and I was honest with him...I did. Prior to going to meet with him, I told Ryan that I wasn't sure I could go through this again and have this result. It was a little bit of the physical but mostly the emotional side that made this really tough. He asked me to give him one more chance to help us get pregnant. I felt that he was really sincere when he said that he knows he can get me pregnant especially since I got pregnant before with our first IUI. He explained that he believed I had some bad eggs which probably explains why I miscarried with our first IUI. Miscarriages during the first trimester are usually attributed to some chromosomal defect. He said my eggs looked fine when they were retrieved. He had the embryologist take a look at them prior to fertilization. He then showed me pictures of the embryos that we didn't transfer. They left them in the media to watch what happened. Looking at the pictures, the embryos didn't look so good. He said if he had the opportunity to do another IVF on me, the only thing he would do differently is to put half in a different media because some embryos don't do well in the media they use even though it's supposed to be a very good media with a high success rate.

In the meantime, he suggested we do a couple more IUIs within the next two months because many women get pregnant within two cycles following an IVF cycle. So he did an ultrasound that day to check for any cysts that might have developed during the IVF cycle. There weren't any so he prescribed 5mg of Femara from cycle day 3 to 7, and 500mg of Metformin from cycle day 3 to 10 and then 1000mg from cycle day 11 on. I was thrilled about starting the Metformin as it is something new that we are trying. I wasn't so thrilled about the Femara because of the side effects. I was tired all day and suffered through constant headaches. Thank goodness I finished it a couple of days ago so I'm feeling a little better. So far I haven't experienced any side effects from the Metformin. We'll see how I feel tomorrow after I increase the dosage. Tomorrow I'll be going in for another ultrasound to check my follicle growth. Hopefully there's more than one follicle.

Pre-Healing

I think I'm floating in the "pre-healing" stage after our first failed IVF. I don't quite think I've started the healing process only because I'm avoiding it..for now until I get home. In the meantime, I've been trying to keep myself busy researching other options for us to pursue besides conventional fertility treatments. What have I done so far?
1. Began doing yoga again (it feels really good and I think it brought on AF)
2. Ordered Randine Lewis' book The Infertility Cure (looking for some
alternative therapies that might work better for than conventional ones)
3. Began looking for acupuncturists/chiropractors/oriental medicine doctors that
practice in our area (I think I may have found one that specializes in women's
wellness and immune disorders which covers me)

I was just telling Ryan this morning that I've been reading up on feng shui for fertility. We're big on feng shui and have implemented it in our homes. Over the course of at least 3 years, we've been adding to our collection of feng shui "cures" to help us conceive. It's so funny. I remember we were a little scared when we bought our first one because of the success stories the salesperson told us. We placed it in the west part of our home and waited. Nothing. So we bought more pieces and added it to the west part of our homes. Still nothing. Then just last night I discovered a forum for feng shui and learned that instead of putting it in the west part of the house, we should be putting it in my "total loss" direction which is in the south. This kind of makes sense because all of the pieces we bought are essentially "cures", so why would we place it in an area that doesn't need to be cured. I think since we have so many, we'll probably try putting some in the south and some in the west just to cover both areas. We'll see what happens.

Last week Thursday was the last dose of progesterone in oil and estrogen. Loreen told me I should expect AF within a few days. I was getting a little worried when all I was seeing was a little brown clear discharge and no cramping like I was experiencing earlier or during previous cycles. After doing a session of yoga yesterday morning, I started to feel some cramping and by late last night AF finally arrived. This morning she's here in full force which is not normal for me, but I guess that's what happens after stopping the progesterone and estrogen. I'm hoping it's flushing out my system well so we can start trying again more successfully.